Friday, February 23, 2018

My Love Story

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails..
This phrase from the Bible about love is actually my foundation on finding the right partner when I was in college. I met my first boyfriend when I was 19. We’ve dated for 6 years, and now we’re married for 10 years with two beautiful children. During those 6 years of dating, we’ve learned a lot about each other. Of course, it’s only natural for a relationship to have petty fights and misunderstandings.

We met on an online chatting room simply talking about each other’s interests and other basic stuff about us. I remember we used IRC, the only chat room available at that time. Unlike now, people would be dating Reading, and other dating sites which gives people a lot of options. On the 4th year onwards of our relationship, we became too comfortable with each other. When he comes to visit my house, I don’t welcome him as warmly as I used to. I just say hi and continue minding my own business whatever I was doing like surfing the net, checking my emails, and stuff. I became careless and also forgotten how to fix myself and look at least pretty decent in front of him.

So eventually, before I knew it, he was starting to fall out of love from me. How do I know? Because he also started to change. He doesn’t visit the house that often anymore, whenever I text him he’s busy, and when we finally go out, he would seem distant.

Until one day when I was in his house, his cell phone rang; he answered it and he immediately went outside the room. I asked him who was it and he said just a friend. I insisted to look at his phone and there I realized he was talking to his new girl. That’s when I realized our relationship must end.

Days past and I feel miserable. I didn’t eat and I was always crying. It’s like my brain wanted to forget him, but my heart doesn’t want to. It also gave me time to think of what I did wrong that made him lost his love for me. I realized a lot of things.

Love Rejoices With The Truth

After 2 weeks, we both set a date and talked in his car.  I wanted him back, so I apologized. I pointed out all the things I did wrong in our relationship and I would change my ways. When I was doing all this, it’s like my brain is asking me, “Why are you doing this? This isn’t you. What happened to your pride? You have lived 20 years without this man.” I guess the logical explanation to this is that I decided to follow my heart. I’ve never loved anyone like him. Living without him made me realize that I love him so much. So if he accepts that if we would still be together, that would be amazing. If not, then I would have to learn to deal with it. It’s an ultimatum I have thought for myself. After hearing me, he embraced me so tight and we both cried. We realized that we have is something special. He admitted that his feelings for the other girl were just infatuation. He only fell for her because he felt I have already neglected him in our relationship making him feel lonely and vulnerable, but he also admitted his mistake.

So I guess when it comes to love, there is no perfect formula for it. Only you and your partner can work with it together and find the formula that suits the both of you with the foundation of love and respect. This is my love story that I can share with you, guys. I hope you could also share yours, too. You may do so in the comments below. 

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